For many, the experience of planning a wedding is filled with excitement, anticipation, and buildup. After months of planning, prepping, and decorating for your most magical day to finally pay off, you may find yourself asking, “what now?” If you’re feeling this way, you may be experiencing post-wedding blues.
I remember when I got married in 2019, it was one of the best days of my life. My wedding was everything I dreamed of, but then I came crashing down to reality. It felt disturbing and confusing that I was so depressed after marrying the love of my life. What’s going on, I thought. Is there something wrong with me?
Absolutely not! In fact, it is quite normal for individuals to feel sad after their wedding day. Some even experience signs of clinical depression. It’s been weeks and months of choosing color partners, flower arrangements, dresses, jewels, catering, and being the center of attention.
After one day, the energy shifts again to now paying bills, going back to work, and engaging in daily responsibilities.
What Are Post-Wedding Blues?
Post-wedding blues can happen to couples when they experience a period of letdown following the excitement of a wedding. It may seem counterintuitive that you feel down after what is considered the happiest days of your life.
However, life is all about the ups and downs, especially after a major life event. Weddings are often a significant and meaningful experience, so when it is over, it seems that there is a lingering feeling of emptiness.
Why Do Couples Experience Post-Wedding Blues?
There are many different reasons why one may feel down after their big day. The time spent putting in work to create the most wonderful day can feel almost anticlimactic once it’s over. Weddings also bring people together.
Family, friends, loved ones are all under one roof, supporting and celebrating you on this most joyous occasion. It’s possible that these get-togethers do not happen often, so in the moment, the rush of happiness is euphoric. However, once the day ends, you may normally crash when reality confronts you again.
Signs of Post-Wedding Blues
Not sure whether you’re experiencing post-wedding blues? Common feelings may look like:
- Feelings of deep sadness
- Disappointment
- Loneliness
- Fatigue
- Sleep difficulties
- Lack of focus
- Not enjoying marital bliss
How to Manage Post-Wedding Depression
- Make Plans to Look Forward to: You just spent most of your time and energy planning for a wedding. Now you have the freedom to focus on other plans and activities that will give you a new sense of excitement. Planning something fun in the weeks that follow the wedding can help with feelings of sadness. Whether it’s the honeymoon, moving in together, or going on fun dates and starting projects, it’s important to create plans to look forward to as newly weds.
- Lean on Your Spouse: Healthy communication is a pillar in a long-lasting marriage. Talk to your partner if you are feeling saddened by the ending of your big day. It is possible they are feeling the same way. This may be the first challenge you face together as a married couple. It is essential to ensure you can support one another in times of emotional distress.
- Define Family Relationships: Some people experience the blues because they feel like they’re losing their family. Being married does not mean your family is lost. Instead, you are extending your own family. It just takes time to redefine the family lines and focus on connecting.
- Seek Marital Counseling: Emotions can feel complex and draining. Experiencing them does not mean your relationship is failing, but it is also important to seek additional support. Counselors can help with processing the pain and provide helpful tips for you and your spouse to work through the post-wedding blues. Your feelings are valid and normal.
At Therapy for Women Center, we specialize in working with women of all ages and life transitions. Remember, marrying someone creates a major life transition, even if it brings happiness. We would be honored to work with you. Click here to learn more about our approach.
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